Michaela d'Artois

Michaela d'Artois is a certified sexologist and coach with a passion for guiding individuals and couples on their journey of self-discovery and connection. Through her practice, INNER ∘ EROS, Michaela helps people embrace intimacy as a tool for healing and personal growth.

Michaela shares her insights on how pleasure plays a key role in self-care, the importance of being in tune with our own desires, and the deep transformative power of intimacy. It’s an invitation to explore how we can create meaningful connections, both with ourselves and others.

What does pleasure mean to you in wellness, and why is it important for self-care?

- For me, pleasure is a powerful tool for grounding & coming back to ourselves.
This could be any means of dropping into our senses and finding joy, from a good meal to a beautiful scent, or holding hands with someone we love. Pleasure is a practice in presence.

How do you stay connected to your emotional and erotic self in a demanding world?

- I’ve learned it’s important to carve out time through small acts throughout the day that help us check in with ourselves on all levels. For me, it means rooting into my body through movement or meditation. Or using a journaling practice to take stock of my current emotions.

How has your work in emotional and erotic intelligence influenced your relationships?

- We are all a work in progress, myself included, but my work has taught me to hold so much compassion and patience for others while also learning how to honor myself in relationships, both platonic and romantic.

What do you wish people understood about connecting with themselves before connecting with others?

- Something I say a lot to my clients is, how can you possibly communicate your desires and needs to someone else if you’re not sure what they are for yourself.
We spend so much time focusing our curiosity on learning about the people we love but rarely show this kind of curiosity to ourselves. It’s an incredible gift to offer yourself the space and time to learn how to connect with yourself before you connect with others. This practice will build trust in yourself, as well as help eliminate shame we might be holding on to.

What lessons about self-love do you wish you had known earlier in life?

- Self-love can feel like a fickle concept, and I think it is subjective to each of us.
It wasn’t until I realized that for me self-love meant building self-trust and a strong line of communication to myself, that I was able to accept myself in all my forms on any given day.

What have you learned about people through your work that still surprises or inspires you?

- The biggest thing that my work has taught me is that so often we feel isolated in our experiences, but we are all just looking to feel seen and loved for who we are at our core. Sometimes I wish I could put all of us in a room to share what we are feeling because I know it would make every single person feel validated and less alone!

How can intimacy help with personal healing and growth?

- There’s this misconception that you have to be fully healed to be loved, but I think that a lot of healing happens in partnership. Intimacy is the deepest, most rewarding form of connection, and when we allow ourselves to lean into it fully, it can be the mirror needed to reflect back to us where the healing and growth lie.

What’s the most important aspect of intimacy that people often overlook?

- That we can’t fully explore intimacy with someone else if we aren’t willing to explore it with ourselves.

What advice would you give to someone struggling to express their needs or desires in relationships?

- Most of us were never taught how to identify our needs, much less express them so be patient with yourself! Learning to build a trusting rapport with yourself through body literacy and journaling can help you understand what feels right or wrong for you outside of anyone else's opinions or preferences. There is no bigger gift you can give yourself than building that relationship with yourself, which will offer your clarity and discernment in all areas of your life!